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Myth 4: A birth parent will forget about the child released for adoption. If you believe you must forget about your child when you choose adoption, your decision will be very hard to live with. If you make an adoption plan for your child, you will not forget and will not want to forget your child. You will want to live without being emotionally crippled by your loss. You will want to remember your pregnancy, your baby's birth, and those precious hours or days shared with your child in the hospital. When you remember, you'll want to feel that you made the most loving, mature, and selfless decision possible, given your circumstances. Myth 5: All adopted children grow up to have serious psychological problems. Perhaps you have heard that adopted children have serious problems with drugs, alcohol, personal relationships, and mental illness. Research does not support this misunderstanding. Studies show that: • Adopted and non-adopted children are similar in frequency of adjustment disorders, delinquency, and mental illness. • Adopted teenagers are as emotionally stable as non-adopted teenagers. • Adopted individuals do not have more family problems than non-adopted people. Myth 6: Birth parents will have emotional problems if they choose adoption. Some birth mothers are afraid that if they choose adoption they will ‘go crazy’ or never be happy again. When you recognize such fear is caused by a misunderstanding about adoption, you don't have to worry anymore. Your grief over losing your child can be painful, but the ability to grieve is a sign of emotional health. Grief is not the same as mental instability. |
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© 2009 Beginnings Counselling & Adoption Services of Ontario Inc.
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